Do you ever have days where everything seems to be going just right? I don’t have them all that often, but yesterday was one of those days.
It all started at 5:48 a.m., the time I set my alarm so that I could go to the gym and keep my commitment. I’m not a morning exerciser, but I’ve come to the reality that it’s the absolute only time I can do it, no matter how insane it feels.
Ever since going back to work full-time, I have been really missing my children. I never see them enough, and I have taken other things out of my life because I realize something has to give. I can’t have it all- work time, kid time and self time. So the self time has been set aside for the time being. And, honestly, I don’t think there is anything really wrong with that for now. I have no choice but to work, but luckily I have a job I can enjoy, since I have to be there anyway. Of course I would rather be home with my kids much more, but for now, I’m learning to be grateful for what I do have — a job where I feel respected, make enough money for our family to get by, and work steady hours that allow me to have evenings, weekends and holidays free, along with a great benefits package and plenty of sick and vacation days.
So, work time has to stay, kid time has to stay, self time must go, unless you can squeeze it in at 6 a.m. But even then, there is the guilt. If I leave for work at 6 a.m., I won’t be home when my kids wake up. Never mind the fact that they currently wake up about 10 minutes before I leave, just enough time to kiss them and say goodbye.
Then, there was divine intervention. At 5:50 a.m., Anne Marie came to my room, whispered, “I’m ready to get up now,” and “I want to help you wake up Thomas.”
I wasn’t going to wake up Thomas, but I was happy to see her. And, because I had packed my bags for workout/work the night before, I had time to read her a story before I left. It was actually better quality time than a normal morning.
I arrived at the gym at 6:25 a.m. and got on the elliptical machine. Normally, early-morning workouts make me sick to my stomach, but this time I felt great.
I got to work by 7:45, the earliest I have ever arrived.
I guess I’ll go again Thursday.